All the time I was awake.
The song of the day is Fever Dreams by Circa Survive. This is a strange song, and when I woke up this morning, it was stuck in my head. I had fever, and I had had..the weirdest three dreams..ever.
In my first dream, I dreamt, that someone was planning to kill me. I can't explain how I knew, I just did. And I couldn't trust anyone, everyone seemed evil and full of hatred.. For some reason, it ended up with me, jumping off a rooftop, and whilst I was falling, I awoke. I wasn't scared, I was just..feeling weird. Quickly I fell asleep again, and dreamt the second, and worst, dream.
I dreamt, that I had gone shopping with my mom, dad, brother and aunt, and that my dad was talking to some man about a car or something like that. All of a sudden, my dad looked over at this shop, and saw, that there was pepsi or something on sale, and said, that I should go buy it for him, since he was talking. I tol my family, that I didn't want to go alone, but for some reason, they pushed me into doing it anyway. So I went into the shop, and immediatly saw some of the boys, that I used to go to school with; some of those, whom used to bully me. So I started walking faster, but they saw me, and started yelling my name. I started running, and all of a sudden, I ran into a lady. I apologized, but the lady seemed to be crazy or something, because she grabbed my neck, and pushed, so that I trembled, and fell with my face into the floor. When I opened my eyes, I saw four pictures laying beside me..one of a fetus, one of two lovers, one of a snake, and one of an apple. I was told by some sort of strange voice inside my head, to point out the one, that I liked the most. I pointed at the lovers, smiled, and thought of Sigurd, and was lifted out of my body. I saw myself lying on the floor, with blood around my head. People were screaming, and crying, and some of the boys that had been after me, ran out, and told my parents, that I was dead..and I realized, that no one could see me or hear me. I saw my parents breaking down in tears, and my view changed. I saw Sigurd, picking up his phone. At first, he seemed happy, but then his expression changed, and he started to cry and say, that it couldn't be true. After this, I saw several of my friends, doing the same thing. At last, I saw my fathers father sitting in a white couch, and crying, with a glass of redwine in his hand, and my fathers mother staring into the air. Then, I woke up. A voice told me, that I could do anything I wanted, so I got up..and everything turned white. I could walk into nothing for all eternity. And then, I really woke up.. I burst into tears, and called Sigurd, and realized I was alive. And..I felt so blessed.
After talking to Sigurd for a while, I hung up, and fell asleep again. I dreamt, that I was playing The Sims 2, and there was this big, new house in my neighborhood, that I didn't recall building, but I moved a family into the house..and all of a sudden, it was not the game anymore, it was me and two friends that was in the house. It was some sort of party/playground/whatever-house, with over a thousand teenagers in it. In the attic, there were girls tied up, saying that they were supposed to be dumped into the river, and all kinds of horrible things..and I left them. When I got downstairs, people started dying, and I saw this message on the wall.. "Chiaki is okay, after all" (in danish: Chiaki er sgu egentlig helt okay) signed with a name, that I know better than anything. The name of a boy I once fell for, and destroyed everything with. Since I knew he was in the house, I started looking for him, as people turned into zombies.. All over the walls there were these strange messages left by him, saying he was responsible, and I started hearing these crying baby-voices everywhere. At last, I entered a big, bright room, and I heard his voice. He told me to come to him, and I went through a door, and there he was. He told me everything was just an illusion, and a game he had created, and I started to cry, and then I woke up. And Fever Dreams was stuck in my head.
My dreams usually..tend to be nightmares. Like, horrormovies, where I have the leading role. But, they are also too bizarre to ever be real. They don't feel real, and I don't feel scared when I wake up. I know that it was a dream. But these three dreams..they followed me into my reality. And they've been stuck with me all day. And I have no idea what they mean.. It scares the shit out of me.
- Chiaki
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