And no one knows what we were, or what we could've been.
The song of the day is Wrong From The Start by To Be Juliet's Secret. I love this song. It makes me kind of happy, even though it's sad..
I've been doing some thinking today. A lot of thinking, actually. Me and my boyfriend had an argument last night..a quite big one. It's okay again, but I was about to leave him. Now you may think 'what the fuck? The boy she says makes her happy, she was about to leave?' - and yes, I was. Because he screwed up. But he knows, like I know he loves me. Therefore, I am still with him.
He said something, that really hit me; I don't want to be your ex. It was a good thing he said this, I guess, but it did really make me think. Think about all of my exes. And that's what I've been thinking about all day; my ex boyfriends. The guys that never even got to become my boyfriends before we fucked it up. All of the guys I've ever liked, and that has ever liked me back. It could've been so beautiful with them; but it didn't turn out that way. I've never asked myself why. But I know now; we were just wrong from the start. I always knew that there would come a breakup; it was wrong from the start. That's why it didn't work out. That's why I'm not with any of them anymore.
So this song is dedicated to every single ex boyfriend, or ex crush, or ex flame, that I have. I am sorry it didn't work out. I truly am.
Now, I am happy, and I am in love, and I have finally found a guy, that I can't see an ending with. I can't see a breakup. I don't know why that day should come. I believe everyone will find this kind of relationship. Maybe more than one time. But hopefully, this is the only time I'll feel this way; hopefully, there won't be a breakup. Because I do definitly not want my boyfriend to be another ex.<3
Oh my God, have you listened to me lately? Lately, I've been fucking crazy..
The song of the day is Some Nights (Intro) by Fun. - so it's the intro to the song Some Nights, also by Fun., which is an absolutely amazing band. I love it.
I've chosen this song, because Some Nights has been stuck in my head all day, but this intro more suits my feelings, and sometimes, I even prefer to listen to this, lol. I know how it feels to just lay awake and think, about all and nothing, and how it feels to stare at the calender and think about when the next problem is going to come up, and how it will be handled.. How it feels to push someone to hold you, and how it feels to not be sure why the person still wants you, when you are as fucking crazy as you are. I do think this intro is about how it feels to feel a bit, or a lot, crazy. That's the meaning I can get from it. And I can definitly relate to that..
The song of the day is When I Look At You by Miley Cyrus. Yes, another Miley Cyrus-song. Last time it wasn't even by her, but she did a cover of it, and I'm sure you associated the song with her, and whatever! This is the song of the day, because it reminds me of how I feel about my boyfriend - and because today, it's been two months since he asked me to be his girl. It's been the two best months in my entire life - and I am very serious about this. It is not just something I'm saying. I haven't been this happy, or this in love, ever before. It's just simply crazy, and I almost cannot believe it. I feel like I'm dreaming, honestly.
When I Look At You has also been playing in the lobby and on the beach and pretty much everywhere on the hotel all day..and it has made me realize just how much I love my boyfriend, and how much I want to be his girl, and be with him..it's amazing. I just...never ever want this to end. I love you, Sigurd, with all my heart, and I want to be with you - forever. I just hope you don't mind.<3
When you worry you make 'em double; don't worry, by happy!
The song of the day is Don't Worry Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin. Now you may question this, and say 'Bob Marley made it!', but no, he didn't. Bob Marley was a great muscician, but he didn't make this one - sorry.
Now that we have this settled, I can tell you that I chose this song because I absolutely love it. And because that today I'm leaving for Egypt, where I will be spending the next week, with not worrying about a thing. So I am sorry if I don't get to blog a lot, but I will seriously be spending all of my time on relaxing, lol!
Stay strong and happy, and don't you worry! I love you all!
Well, the song of the day is What Makes You Beautiful by One Direction. It's the song of the day, because I've fallen in love with it. It's not the kind of music that I usually fall in love with, but I just..I don't know. It's just so amazingly cute and beautiful and sweet and adorable and everything! I really love it! One Direction is definitly worth a listen, if you like boybands.
You make my life worthwhile, like you've completed me somehow..
The song of the day is A Lovely Sound by Chase Coy.. This song somehow makes me sad and happy, and makes me feel hope, all at the same time.. It makes me think of my boyfriend, and the way I feel about him. How it feels being apart, and how it does not matter, because when we're together, it's just so amazing. It's just..I cannot describe it. It does indeed make a lovely sound.
I've never felt as happy as I feel, whenever he is with me. Whenever I lay in his arms with my head on his chest, and listens to his calm heartbeat, and feel more safe than I've ever felt before. Whenever I look him in the eyes, and I know that even though it feels like it, I'm not dreaming. Whenever my lips touches his, and my heart skips a beat, and my hands are shaking, and my breath is slow, and my body is simply filled with love and happiness.
That's the lovely sound it makes, whenever we come together. That's the sound of love.
"For the first time in my life, I know that I'm in love. I could write a thousand songs about you, they would never be enough.. But when we come together it makes such a lovely sound! That's why I'd give anything I have, to work this out.."<3
I'm right there, if you get lonely; give this song another listen!
The song of the day is Hey There Delilah by Plain White T's. It is the song of the day because it's been stuck in my head all day. And I love it. And it somehow makes me think of my boyfriend, whom I will be visiting tomorrow!
Humhumhum..what have I done today? I have finished my project, and I've been stressed out, lol. I've been talking to my friend from Australia, and I've been playing out in the snow. And I have bought my lovely videocamera. My baby. Lol. A Sony HDR-CX130. I am in love with it. <33333
The song of the day is Papercut by Linkin Park. Mainly because I love it, and because I've made a music video for it. Here's the description:
First of all; this is a musicvideo for Papercut by Linkin Park, that I made for a project in school. I was in group with a boy named Patrick, and we decided that we'd love to make a project about schizophrenia, because we were very fascinated of it. After reading about it, and afterwards writing all we've readen down, we made a script for this video. At last - well, today - we made the video. We spent the entire morning filming, and I spent about an hour on putting it together. So it was nothing big, really. But I liked the outcome anyway.
It is of course about a girl who suffers from paranoid shizophrenia. She is hallucinating, and seeing a boy, that is "stalking her". What is real and what is not is up for yourself to decide, lol. I can tell you, that there are clues, that'll tell you wether she actually dies, or not. Now, do you dare to think about it?
Hope you'll enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own the music! It belongs entirely to Linkin Park!
Please tell me what you think, and if something could be done better - but be nice, I'm not professional, lol.
And tell 'em what you think about the way you handled everything..
The song of the day is When You See My Friends by Mayday Parade, because it is an awesome song, and I love it. And because it's been stuck in my head all day. And I am pretty busy right now, so I don't have time to write much...sorry.
So just take my hand, you know that I will never leave your side.
The song of the day is The Gambler by Fun. You may ask me why, and I can only answer you, that I don't have the answer. Listen to the song, find out what it makes you feel, and think about that. This song makes me happy. And makes me think, indeed. That is why I chose it. Now, think, feel, and whatever else you want to do. That is what my evening has gone with.
The song of the day, is Love Will Find A Way from The Lion King 2. I chose this song, because I'm going to share a very personal text about me, that I've written today, and this song has always been very, very important to me. Lion King 2 was my favorite disney movie when I was a child, you see. Anyways, here you go, with the personal text:
My name is undefined. I am undefined. In words I cannot be described, I must show my personality through action. Therefore, I am undefined, until you've come to know me. And yet, at that point, I will still be undefined. I will never be written down, nor put in a box. I am a constantly changing individual, who can simply not be defined. For that, I am truly sorry, for most of the people today, are craving individuals, who will simply not take their time to get to know me. If I can feel that you are that kind of individual, don't expect anything from me; I will simply shut down before you.
I am a master of suspense, as I like to view myself as what we today call 'an artist'. Not drawing, painting, or mainly being creative with my hands, for no one's sake no, but an artist in life. You never know what I have up my sleeve, you never know what is around the next corner. Neither do I. Every night I fall asleep, not knowing what tomorrow will bring. Never knowing what tomorrow will bring. I will never know. Ever. Not in this life, not in my next, nor even in Nirvana will I be sure. Therefore, life is always thrilled, and full of suspense - and I enjoy that, I play with it, and I use it. Bam, master of suspense - in life, after all.
Already, you are wondering of so many things. Putting so many questions to everything. Who is this girl? What's her name? What's her age? Who oes she sake 'for no one's sake'? Why did she mention Nirvana? Is it the band? For the love of no one, Nirvana is such a state that I don't even know what it contains, but it is certainly not a band. All I know, is that I hunger for this place, more than anything. I want to be there, I want to know. I want to know the meaning of life, why I was put here, I want to remember and forget, and be everything and nothing at the same. I want to become Buddha. Therefore, I meditate, I pray, I do whatever my religion calls for me to do. I do actually do these things. As often as I want to, though. Nothing must come between me, and freedom, happiness, and basicly life.
I enjoy life. Life is my everything, yet my nothing. Life is my strength, yet my weakness. Life is my reason, yet my evasion. Life is in me, and I am in life, and I enjoy every second, both the good and the bad. I hate being me, yet I love living. I love thinking, dreaming, feeling, smelling, touching, hearing, sensing..everything that comes with life. After all, life is indeed invented to be lived, isn't that right?
I hope I bring up a lot of questions in your head. Because that is excactly what I want to do. Make people ask themself questions. Make them think. Make them see things. Make them feel. Sense. Dream. But all of these things, comes after the questions. The questions we ask ourselves. And why, do we ask ourselves these questions? I don't know. Hopefully, someone or something sometimes wants us to realize something. That is why filmmaking is my goal. How many people does not go to the cinema once in a while, to watch a movie? And if my movie is in the cinema, then what are the chances that they go see that one? Well, it all depends on personalities, but after all, I can get to at least some people, with my movie. I can make them question things. Ask themselves questions. You see, that is what movies are all about. Questions. And sometimes answers, that leads to new questions.
Now you have a lot of questions running through your mind. So do I.
