Love is never wrong, and so it never dies.
The song of the day, is Love Will Find A Way from The Lion King 2. I chose this song, because I'm going to share a very personal text about me, that I've written today, and this song has always been very, very important to me. Lion King 2 was my favorite disney movie when I was a child, you see. Anyways, here you go, with the personal text:
My name is undefined. I am undefined. In words I cannot be described, I must show my personality through action. Therefore, I am undefined, until you've come to know me. And yet, at that point, I will still be undefined. I will never be written down, nor put in a box. I am a constantly changing individual, who can simply not be defined. For that, I am truly sorry, for most of the people today, are craving individuals, who will simply not take their time to get to know me. If I can feel that you are that kind of individual, don't expect anything from me; I will simply shut down before you.
I am a master of suspense, as I like to view myself as what we today call 'an artist'. Not drawing, painting, or mainly being creative with my hands, for no one's sake no, but an artist in life. You never know what I have up my sleeve, you never know what is around the next corner. Neither do I. Every night I fall asleep, not knowing what tomorrow will bring. Never knowing what tomorrow will bring. I will never know. Ever. Not in this life, not in my next, nor even in Nirvana will I be sure. Therefore, life is always thrilled, and full of suspense - and I enjoy that, I play with it, and I use it. Bam, master of suspense - in life, after all.
Already, you are wondering of so many things. Putting so many questions to everything. Who is this girl? What's her name? What's her age? Who oes she sake 'for no one's sake'? Why did she mention Nirvana? Is it the band? For the love of no one, Nirvana is such a state that I don't even know what it contains, but it is certainly not a band. All I know, is that I hunger for this place, more than anything. I want to be there, I want to know. I want to know the meaning of life, why I was put here, I want to remember and forget, and be everything and nothing at the same. I want to become Buddha. Therefore, I meditate, I pray, I do whatever my religion calls for me to do. I do actually do these things. As often as I want to, though. Nothing must come between me, and freedom, happiness, and basicly life.
I enjoy life. Life is my everything, yet my nothing. Life is my strength, yet my weakness. Life is my reason, yet my evasion. Life is in me, and I am in life, and I enjoy every second, both the good and the bad. I hate being me, yet I love living. I love thinking, dreaming, feeling, smelling, touching, hearing, sensing..everything that comes with life. After all, life is indeed invented to be lived, isn't that right?
I hope I bring up a lot of questions in your head. Because that is excactly what I want to do. Make people ask themself questions. Make them think. Make them see things. Make them feel. Sense. Dream. But all of these things, comes after the questions. The questions we ask ourselves. And why, do we ask ourselves these questions? I don't know. Hopefully, someone or something sometimes wants us to realize something. That is why filmmaking is my goal. How many people does not go to the cinema once in a while, to watch a movie? And if my movie is in the cinema, then what are the chances that they go see that one? Well, it all depends on personalities, but after all, I can get to at least some people, with my movie. I can make them question things. Ask themselves questions. You see, that is what movies are all about. Questions. And sometimes answers, that leads to new questions.
Now you have a lot of questions running through your mind. So do I.
- Chiaki
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